Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Newcomer of the Year

The nominees here have shown that they are starting strong and will continue to be strong for the rest of their careers. Or live in shame. This is a gamble, because it’s hard to say who are the truly talented and who are just going to be flashes in the pan. Thank God, Milli Vanilli isn’t a newcomer anymore.

Derrick Rose
Ok, I’ve got to give you all a warning here. I’m a Bulls fan so this one is a little bittersweet. After winning the Rookie of the Year award and taking the Bulls to that nail-biting series with the Celtics, he’s been a little underwhelming this season because of a nagging ankle injury, but you can’t deny that he is going to help change the direction of the winds in the Windy City.

Lady GaGa
Oh, how I love controversy. She can’t be nominated for the Best New Artist Grammy this year because she was nominated for a throwaway award last year. Luckily, I have not such qualms. I banged my head to Poker Face. I swayed to Paparazzi. I danced like a maniac to Bad Romance. And I did it all this year.

Modern Family
Specifically, the children, since everyone knows that Ed O’Neil is a TV god who has survived the annals of type-casting. Those children are hilarious and even though they have had bit parts in other shows before, they are finally able to shine in this well-scripted show about family.

Taylor Schilling
One of the few bright things I can say about NBC is that they did right by casting newcomer Taylor Schilling to the lead role of Mercy. I can believe she’s a broken war veteran nurse and it doesn’t hurt that she’s easy on the eyes as well. Although I’ve only seen a couple episodes of the show, I have seen her go through the whole spectrum of drama emotions. She’s got a good future if NBC doesn’t pull her down with it.

Daniela Ruah
As the new star in a cast of familiar faces (LL Cool J and Chris O’Donnell), she’s been able to hold her own with the guys. The show, itself, isn’t much to speak of and her screen time is limited because of her third-to-fourth tier billing on the marquee, but you can feel that she may become something special or at least a seasoned veteran

And the Winner is...

Lady GaGa!

The Grammys can eat it! She was able to dominate the music scene from the beginning of the year to the end and for that, she deserves to be called the Best Newcomer of the Year… even if there may have to be an asterisk on it.

TV Channel of the Year

Channel of the Year? Yep. That’s an award I hand out for the TV channel that has grasped my joy the most this year. NBC, you have disappointed me this year. Tsk, tsk, tsk.

• ABC
This was the channel I used to make fun of a lot. They would have all of these critically acclaimed shows that barely last through an entire season due to really poor ratings. But like a high school nerd, it grew up to be a successful businessman and can buy and sell the bullies that used to give it wedgies. With stellar shows like Castle, Modern Family, and… Grey’s Anatomy. Yes, that’s right! I watched Grey’s Anatomy (and Private Practice). They hooked with a single scene after Derek completed an impossible day-long operation that the chief ordered him not to do.

Derek: Let’s try and put this behind us and move on. I can if you can.
Chief: You’re fired. Immediately, get the hell out of my hospital
Derek: No I’m not. Go home, sleep on it. We’ll talk more tomorrow.

Yeah, that was badass to the max.

• FOX
Aw, Fox. You’re the channel that takes so many odd steps while walking through the week that you look like you’re dancing. Your animation night of Family Guy and other Seth MacFarlane creations will always bring a smile to my face. Your stern stomps of Lie to Me and House are controlling Mondays with an iron fist. Your steps outside the box with Fringe, Dollhouse (soon to be cancelled), and Glee are almost whimsical. Now I hear you might be bringing in My Name is Earl from NBC’s dark abyss. Encore!

• CBS
The master of the 1-hour crime dramas (CSI, NCIS, Criminal Minds, etc) has dominated the hours before the news and late night shows. It helps that NBC threw in the towel with the Jay Leno Show, but instead of also taking a couple steps back because of the economy, CBS has decided to milk more out of their popular shows than ever before, by creating an NCIS spin-off and doing a cross-over series with all of their CSIs. Fandom is happy. Fandom is very happy.

• Comedy Central
Ok, there were some missteps in my opinion with the Jeff Dunham Show and that show with Demitri Martin, but with staples like The Daily Show, The Colbert Report, and South Park, Comedy Central can take a couple rolls of the dice and crap out some losses. I also say kudos to the Colbert Report, for its week in the war zone to salute the troops with the USO.

• USA
I only really need two words to explain this nomination: Dog Show. I mean, Burn Notice! Along with strong newcomers in White Collar and Royal Pains and adding Jeff Goldblum to Law and Order: Criminal Intent, I say USA has done a spectacular job at keeping me away from the local channels. Oh yeah, and they also have some popular long-running show called WWE Raw.

And the Winner is…

ABC!

*sniffle* If only Pushing Daisies was alive to see this *tear drop*.

Hottie of the Year

To be nominated for Hottie of the Year, the Hottie must have done something noticeable in the year 2009, like a TV show or movie. They don’t have to be good; they just have to be hot while doing it. Sorry Halle Berry, commercials don’t count.

• The Doc
Okay, I’ll admit it. This is more of a personal nomination, but the Doc is definitely a Hottie and has done something important in 2009. And that’s making the Deuce happy by being in his life. I’d like to think she feels the same.

Daniela Ruah
She’s the new Hottie on NCIS: Los Angeles. Even though the show is mediocre at best, there’s no denying that she’s a betty. And thanks to the LA weather, it’s all but guaranteed that they’ll never cover her up with a puffy parka and snow shoes.

Rashida Jones
Here’s a Hottie that first appeared on my radar when she became the “other woman” in The Office to create a Jim/Pam triangle. Then she moved on to do Parks and Recreation with Amy Poehler. Of course, before she made that last stop in 2009, she was Paul Rudd’s fiancée in I Love You, Man. She’s got a girl-next-door vibe and can run with a dirty joke. Now that’s hot!

Katy Perry
She first blasted into my sights with her first single in 2008 “I Kissed a Girl”. At first, I thought she was going to be a one-hit wonder because of the subject of her song. Then she rolled through 2009 with a handful of other hits (with sexy music videos to elicit more thumbs up). Heck, I even bought her album. Of course, I wasn’t fully aware of her hotness until I saw her perform live on the Today show this summer. Yowza!

Rachel Nichols
This has definitely been a great year to be Rachel Nichols. Before 2009, I was not even aware of her existence, but thanks to a cameo role hot green alien in Star Trek along with her notable role as Scarlet in G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra (where she runs on a treadmill in a sports bra… mmmm). In 2009, it’s good to be Rachel Nichols.

And the Winner is…

Rashida Jones!

Rashida Jones had me biting my nails during The Office because if I were Jim, I couldn’t choose between her or Jenna Fischer, and that’s saying a lot. Then in I Love You, Man, she tells Paul Rudd’s character that she likes to go “downtown”, if you know what I mean. That’s when she had me hook, line, and sinker. Stack on the fact that she’s not co-starring in her own Office-like show on NBC, and this Hottie has earned this award.

*Side Note: Doc…. Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry!

Sunday, December 27, 2009

2009 Golden Throne Award Nominees

By no means have I watched every movie, experienced every television show, or played every video game this year, but I have gotten through a good chunk of the aformentioned escapist forms of entertainment and have decided to hand out awards to those that have entertained me the most this year.  If you're looking for artsy-fartsy period dramas, films where the men cry as much as the women, or critically acclaimed movies that bombed at the box office, then you're looking in the wrong place.  A key requirement to be nominated is to be interesting enough to grab mention and make me want to watch it.

There are some ground rules:
A movie must have been in the theaters between 12/08 thru 11/09.  Sorry, Avatar and Sherlock Holmes.
I must have watched a show at least for 1 episode.
A game can be nominated even though I have not finished it or if I only played a demo (come on folks, games are getting pricey and finishing one game can take months upon months).  This also means that Xbox 360 and Wii games are at a disadvantage since I'm a PS3 gamer.

Well, before I rant too long and lose your interest completely, here are the nominees for the 2009 Golden Throne Awards.  The winners will be announced in the coming days with greater details.

Game of the Year
• Uncharted 2
• Dragon Age: Origins
• Call Of Duty: Modern Warfare
• Batman: Arkham Asylum
• Beetles: Rock Band

Movie of the Year
• The Hangover
• Inglorious Basterds
• Up
• Slumdog Millionaire
• Star Trek

TV Show of the Year (Comedy)
• 30 Rock
• Modern Family
• How I Met Your Mother
• Family Guy
• The Colbert Report

TV Show of the Year (Drama)
• NCIS
• Burn Notice
• Lie To Me
• Castle
• Grey’s Anatomy

Movie Actress of the Year
• Sandra Bullock
• Meryl Streep
• Amy Adams
• Emily Blunt
• Reese Witherspoon

Movie Actor of the Year
• Brad Pitt
• George Clooney
• Ryan Reynolds
• John Krasinski
• Gerard Butler

Movie Character of the Year
• Leigh Ann Tuohy (Sandra Bullock, Blind Side)
• Alan Garner (Zach Galifianakis, The Hangover)
• Dr. Bones McCoy (Karl Uban, Star Trek)
• Lt. Aldo Raine (Brad Pitt, Inglorious Basterds)
• B.O.B (Seth Rogan, Monsters Vs. Aliens)

Movie Cast of the Year
• Monsters Vs Aliens
• The Proposal
• I Love You, Man
• Star Trek
• The Hangover

Movie Villain of the Year
• Deadpool (Nolan North, Hulk Vs.)
• Col. Hans Landa (Christoph Waltz, Inglorious Basterds)
• Victor “Sabertooth” Creed (Liev Schrieber, Wolverine)
• Galaxor (Rainn Wilson, Monsters Vs Aliens)
• Mr. Chow (Ken Jeong, The Hangover)

TV Actress of the Year
• Courtney Cox
• Kyra Segwick
• Tina Fey
• Jaime Pressley
• Stana Katic

TV Actor of the Year
• Tim Roth
• Simon Baker
• Nathan Fillion
• Alec Baldwin
• Hugh Laurie

TV Character of the Year
• Doctor Who (David Tennant, Doctor Who)
• Liz Lemon (Tina Fey, 30 Rock)
• Sheldon Cooper (Jim Parsons, Big Bang Theory)
• Dexter Morgan (Michael C. Hall, Dexter)
• Gregory House (Hugh Laurie, House MD)

TV Cast of the Year
• 30 Rock
• NCIS
• The Office
• Modern Family
• Big Bang Theory

Best New Show of the Year
• Glee
• Modern Family
• Cougar Town
• Royal Pains
• Parks and Recreation

Man Crush of the Year
• Ryan Reynolds
• Nathan Fillion
• Liam Neeson
• Hugh Jackman
• David Tennant

Athlete of the Year
• Kobe Bryant
• Adrian Peterson
• Usain Bolt
• Manny Pacquio
• Peyton Manning

Comic Book Movie of the Year
• X-Men Origins: Wolverine
• Wonder Woman
• Watchmen
• Hulk Vs.
• Transformers 2: Rise of the Fallen

Biggest Surprises of the Year
• YE Yang beats Tiger Woods
• Arizona Cardinals go to the Super Bowl
• Up makes me emotional in the first 15 minutes
• ABC gets it right
• The Deuce and the Doc

Newcomer of the Year
• Derrick Rose
• Lady GaGa
• Modern Family
• Taylor Schilling
• Daniela Ruah

TV Channel of the Year
• ABC
• FOX
• CBS
• Comedy Central
• USA

Hottie of the Year
• The Doc
• Daniela Ruah
• Rashida Jones
• Katy Perry
• Rachel Nichols

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

The Introduction!

Hello, one and all, to the first post of what will be a labor of love for myself and whomever I wish to include in my colorful world of innuendoes, skewed priorities, and straight-up hypocrisy for as long as I can. Of course, I’ve also said the same thing about exercising regularly, learning Mandarin Chinese, and squeezing my own orange juice. But, what the heck, I’ll give it a shot.

Since this is my first blog, I've used the template provided to me, but I will be making modifications to the design from time to time, so feel free to comment about the page designs and even comment on some of the content as well.

Here are a couple main categories I’m planning on carrying out on this blog:

Man Crush of the Week:
I’m a dude. Let’s get that straight right now. I have a totally awesome girlfriend (The Doc) and she’s not imaginary. So what’s up with this? Well, as a dude, I can totally appreciate the things dudes do and have dedicated a shrine to shear manliness… I’m a dude with a girlfriend. Let’s not forget that fact.

Reviews (of anything):
I have no training in being a critic, but I’ve got opinions and will let you know when things suck or rock.

Rants I Will Regret:
I can get emotional. I can even get loud. I can definitely say things I will regret. Period.

Annual/Monthly Awards:
Everyone loves awards, unless you’re a loser. And you’re not losers… are you?

So will these categories all last long? Probably.

Could they evolve into something better? Only if such a thing is possible.

Could I add other categories or random things I think are funny, but turn out to be something that I’ll be forced to take off? Oh, most definitely.

Do I seem to have a love affair with the ENTER key on my keyboard?

YES

Stay tuned for my 2009 Awards about things I care about. That’s right! My first real post will be an Awards section for the year we’ve all experienced and a recap of the things I didn't blog about yet.

Peace Out,
The Deuce

Welcome (Almost there)

Under Construction.

Expected launch date:  December 31, 2009 (could be sooner).